


Lavender Hot Chocolate

by AutomaticWastelandFox



Series: Have a Drink on Me [4]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alya Césaire & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug Friendship, Alya Césaire Is Not an Idiot, Alya Césaire Needs a Hug, Alya Césaire Redemption, Alya Césaire sugar, Depression, Everyone Needs A Hug, Female Friendship, Fix-It, Fixing Relationships, Forgiveness, Friendship, Friendship Takes Work, Friendship/Love, Gen, Guilt, Lila Rossi's Lies Are Exposed, Marinette Dupain-Cheng Is a Sweetheart, Marinette Dupain-Cheng Needs a Hug, Marinette Dupain-Cheng is a Good Friend, Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug Identity Reveal, Mental Health Issues, Rebuilding, Self Care, Self-Hatred, Strained Friendships, Talking, We're Going to Be Okay, they get their hugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:28:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25692067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AutomaticWastelandFox/pseuds/AutomaticWastelandFox
Summary: They may not be friends anymore, but when the Ladyblog is unexpectedly deleted Marinette knows something must be terribly wrong with Alya. She won't answer Marinette, but maybe she will listen to Ladybug.
Relationships: Alya Césaire & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: Have a Drink on Me [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1676470
Comments: 32
Kudos: 392





	Lavender Hot Chocolate

**Author's Note:**

> Fourth installment of the series Have a Drink on Me where we finally catch up to former best friend Alya Cesaire who has straight up not been having a good time. Follows the initial story Lemonade where Marinette takes up Audrey Bourgeois' offer of apprenticeship and escapes her toxic situation.

Marinette knew something was wrong when the Ladyblog went down. Not just down for maintenance or ‘sorry we’re experiencing technical difficulties be back soon,’ but well and truly gone. The entire web domain had simply vanished as if it had never existed. There had been no announcement that the blog would be going down and no explanation had since been given. Even more concerning, Alya the well known and vocal Ladyblogger had vanished as well: instagram, facebook, twitter, tumblr, even her wildly popular archive of our own account was gone. Every social media outlet the girl had posted on had been deleted. 

Avid followers of the blog were tweeting frantically, posting on every other blog site that covered the Paris heroes as they searched for answers. Many cited that it had been a long time coming pointing out that the quality of the blog had been lacking in past months with fewer updates and less thorough discussions about the heroes and akuma. It had become little more than a glorified photo gallery, mostly just pictures and not even the quality close up ones they had come to expect. Needless to say, fans were only growing more and more frustrated and confused as the hours passed and no response from the Ladyblogger came. 

So, Marinette did the only logical thing she could possibly do. She panicked and called on her transformation before swinging across the city via magical yo-yo at breakneck speed determined to find Alya. Which is how she found herself now, hanging nearly perpendicular from the side of her former friend’s brownstone home trying to surreptitiously gaze through the dark windows hoping to catch a glimpse of the blogger.

She had of course sent some rapid fire texts beforehand. She wasn’t completely crazy after all. But, like most of the texts sent to her former bestie over the last six months, they had all gone unanswered. Her panic continued to swell as she looked through the dark windows of Alya’s room until, finally, a lump on the bed shifted. A bright light illuminated the room as a slender hand appeared from beneath the covers clutching a familiar phone case. The screen was lit with what appeared to be an incoming call, but the hand just silenced the ringer before going limp allowing the cell phone to tumble to the floor. 

Marinette flip flopped between extreme relief at finding her friend seemingly safe and whole, and choking anxiety with the burning urge to reach out and help the girl with...whatever had happened. When Alya had stopped responding to her texts and messages, truly completely stopped, Marinette’s heart had broken clean in half. Adrien’s cold shoulder had hurt, and the rest of the class going radio silence had stung, but Alya’s abandonment had pitched her into genuine heartbreak. Her bestie, her sister, her co-conspirator had suddenly vanished. No sleepovers, no mile long chain of texts, no four hour phone calls just because… no one holding her when she just needed to let loose to rant and rage without fear of judgement. 

Still, she had respected Alya’s decision, even if it hurt. She quit sending the texts, she quit tagging the girl in funny posts, and she quit trying to call. Chloe had raged on her behalf begging her to slam the other girl on social media, to take out her heartbreak on the one who had hurt her, to just go ape shit. She didn’t. She didn’t make a fuss. She just allowed the friendship to die. Marinette Dupain-Cheng and Alya Cesaire were no longer friends. It wasn’t her place to reach out where she obviously wasn’t welcome anymore, but maybe it could be Ladybug’s.

She took a deep breath to calm her racing heart as she plastered on her biggest hero smile and knocked firmly on the window. She could do this. She could totally do this. But as Alya sat straight up on the bed and looked at her window with wide eyes the covers she had been wrapped in fell away and suddenly Ladybug wasn’t so sure anymore. 

Alya looked like hell. Her normally rich tawny brown skin was a pallid grey. Her hair, always a perfect ombre, was faded and hung limply around her shoulders in an unkempt tangle. Her eyes remained owlishly wide as she wrapped herself back in the thick comforter and shuffled slowly to the window. When the glass slid open Ladybug had to struggle to keep her smile in place. She was careful not to wrinkle her nose as she was hit by the musty scent of body odor and stale air. 

“Ladybug? Is...is everything alright? Is it an akuma? Do you need Rena?” Marinette felt her heart twist as her former friend’s eyes seemed to spark just a little as her expression became hopeful. She didn’t miss how Alya’s voice had edged on desperation. 

“No. No, nothing like that Alya. Paris is safe. I noticed the Ladyblog was gone today, and I was just...worried about my biggest fan. A lot of people are worried about you Alya. Is everything ok?” For a second she thought the girl was going to tell her everything was fine. Alya straightened her back and lifted her chin, but when she opened her mouth only a small squeak came out.

“...no.”

Ladybug’s heart broke again right then. Because before her very eyes, one of the strongest girls she knew, the confident girl she had almost passed along the mantle of ladybug to, crumbled. Alya collapsed to the floor dissolving into a sobbing, shuddering pile of fabric. Ladybug didn’t waste a second as she slipped through the window and scooped the whimpering girl in her arms shushing and rocking her like she would a small child. 

“I’m a terrible journalist.” Ladybug almost missed the muffled whisper as Alya mumbled into her shoulder. So far the girl hadn’t made a move to return Ladybug’s embrace, but she wasn’t fighting against it either. “No one should be getting news from me.”

“What are you talking about Alya? The Ladyblog is wonderful, not just because it’s about me.” Ladybug loosened her grip and looked down at Alya attempting to channel a little Chat Noir into her grin. The girl wouldn’t meet her gaze choosing to focus on a spot on the ceiling instead. “I mean, I’ve always wished you were more careful Alya. Seeing you running at an akuma can be pretty terrifying, but the site is so helpful. I can’t even count the number of times you had critical akuma information posted and out there for the public before any news media had a report ready. People depend on you Alya.”

By now Alya had stilled in her arms and was actually staring her in the face with her red rimmed eyes. “Why didn’t you ever say anything Ladybug?”

“What are you talking about Alya?” Now Ladybug was really confused.

“About Lila.”

Ladybug felt her heart stutter as she inhaled sharply. She had expected Alya to be angry if they ever discussed this, but she just looked tired. It hadn’t been an accusation, just a statement. And… what was there to say? She felt her own body sag as she carefully chose her next words.

“When you posted that video, the one with Lila Rossi, I was disappointed in you Alya.” She felt Alya flinch in her arms as she spoke, but the girl didn’t look away. “At first, I didn’t come to you just because of that. I was so stunned that you could believe that. You know me better than most people Alya, I like to think that we’re friends. You had already been Rena by then, held a miraculous, and I know that I had stressed to you about how important your identity was. Chat didn’t even know my civilian identity Alya. I couldn’t believe you would ever think I would share those kinds of secrets with a civilian. Even if I had, I couldn’t believe you had posted a video with a girl bragging about it. I thought you would have understood what a breach of trust that would be.

Then I didn’t come to you because I was angry. The both of you had been so incredibly stupid posting that. It painted a huge target on Lila’s back. I’ll never know why he didn’t, but Hawkmoth could have easily gone after her thinking he could get vital miraculous information. Hell, any random psycho on the internet that’s obsessed with me could have targeted her. But, none of that happened and I guess I just thought it would be better to just ignore it at that point. No sense in stirring up any more trouble. That was… unbecoming of me as a hero Alya. I should have come to you and asked you take the article down and actually spoken to you Alya. I’m sorry.”

“It was just…” Alya licked her lips as she struggled to find the right words. “Her life sounded so exciting. Lila was everything everyone ever wanted. It was so easy to listen...to believe. It was easy because… we all wanted to. I wanted to. I don’t know why it never occurred to me that she was lying. Looking back now… I think it was just her confidence. She’s so charismatic Ladybug. Just sitting in class with her everyday, you wouldn’t understand how believable she can be. I think… if it had just been one or two lies I might have questioned her, but EVERYTHING about her life was that amazing. I mean… who could lie about everything? I just wanted to feel like I was a part of it too...her life I mean.”

“When I posted that interview with Lila the Ladyblog basically exploded. My daily site traffic tripled. There were people that tried to call me out then, but I didn’t care. I just ignored them and deleted all their comments. The internet is full of trolls after all.” Alya pulled away now sitting next to Ladybug with her back against the wall as she stared straight ahead, her face once more void of emotion.. “For months I’ve just sat here and turned the whole thing around in my head, and I’m so ashamed. I called myself a journalist, but I violated every principle of journalism: fairness, impartiality, truth, and accuracy. I forgot everything I stood for, and now I’m holding myself accountable. I deserve this.”

“Alya…”

“Do you know what the worst part is, Ladybug?” Alya’s tears were coming again now streaming slow rivers down her face. “I let Lila hurt my best friend too. She sowed one little seed of doubt...and I let it grow and turn me against Marinette. She knew Lila was a liar right from the start. She knew, and she tried to warn me. And do you know what I did?"

"I yelled at her. I told her she was jealous.” Alya’s smile was wry as she turned her head to look Ladybug in the eyes again as she made a listless flapping motion with her hands. “Just brushed her off. My best friend got expelled because Lila knew she had found her out and she wanted to get rid of her. She almost caused a mass akumatization that would have made Heroes’ Day look like a joke. The last time we really spoke… really spoke, I told her I would get to the bottom of who had framed her. She tried to tell me about Lila again and I still didn’t listen. Nope, that’s when I wanted to be a good journalist and investigate. Do you know who actually saved my best friend’s reputation and exposed Lila? Not me. Not the journalist whose best friend was counting on her. Nope. Chloe fucking Bourgeois did. The girl that has single handedly caused more akuma’s than the rest of Paris combined is the one that saved the day.”

Ladybug was silent searching for the right words to comfort the girl, but it was hard to console someone that was upset on your own behalf when they didn’t know they were talking to you. She startled when Alya let out a sudden harsh bark of laughter. 

“I wish Marinette would have just stopped talking to me then. It would have been so much easier. It’s what I deserved, but no. She just acted like everything was fine! She messaged me like normal wanted to hang out and talk. Not even a single I told you so… I just couldn’t do it anymore Ladybug. I just stopped replying. I’d set my phone down and I’d swear I was going to respond to her in a little bit… or after dinner… or the next day. Then I just ...couldn’t anymore. I couldn't stand to look at her anymore. Just seeing all that love in her eyes that I didn't deserve made me feel so sick. So you see Ladybug, I’m not just a terrible journalist, I’m a terrible friend too. Just a terrible person. I’m just an awful human and I deserve to be alone.”

“Alya, where are your parents?”

Alya shrugged one shoulder and curled deeper into her comforter. “They took the twins to see a movie… they’re giving me space.”

“What about Nora?”

Another half shrug. “Training maybe? Probably? I’m not sure I haven’t talked to her lately. We yelled at each other last time.”

“Ok then how about we call Nino to come over?” 

“I broke up with him. I can’t even muster the energy to leave my room Ladybug. I can’t love him like this. I can’t even love me. It's ironic really. Here I am at my lowest and I’ve pushed away everyone that would even care… Wait, is that how irony works?” Alya was looking away again chewing her lip as she seemed to consider her own question.

"So you've just been..." Ladybug licked her lips nervously taking in Alya's vacant stare. "...dealing with this alone? That's so dangerous Alya. Hawkmoth could-"

"Oh, he's tried." Ladybug startled at the candid admission. Her moutn opened and closed several times, but Alya never even turned her head to look at her. The girl just raised one shoulder in a lackluster half-shrug and kept talking. "A few times actually. I think he finally just got tired of me ignoring him. I... didn't want to become an akuma. No one in Paris deserves to suffer because of my stupid decisions except for me. The last thing I wanted to do was be even more of a burden... especially on you Ladybug."

Ladybug just sat absolutely still for a long silent moment. Then, in one fluid motion she effortlessly scooped Alya in her arms and walked towards the door. Alya squeaked in surprise and wrapped her arms around Ladybug’s neck, her eyes wide in alarm.

“Ladybug, what are you doing? Where are we going?”

“Bathroom.” Alya didn’t struggle as Ladybug carried her through the house. She probably should have made an attempt to at least pretend to need directions, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. Alya was sick and she needed her. As she entered the bathroom she deposited the bewildered girl on the toilet and set to work running a bath. She turned the knobs to the perfect temperature by pure muscle memory and poured Alya’s favorite soap into the hot running water, a mild sandalwood Marinette had got her for Christmas along with a fluffy hand embroidered robe. With a small crooked smile she noticed it still hung behind the door. “Do you need me to help you in?” 

“Why are you doing this?” Alya hadn’t said a word as Ladybug had worked instead watching her in a sort of daze. 

“Because you need it Alya, and you deserve it.” 

“...I can manage.”

Ladybug didn’t argue as she knelt in front of the obviously hurting girl. Instead she took Alya’s hands in her own giving a gentle squeeze and a comforting smile. “I’ll be right outside if you need me.”

She gave one final squeeze before slipping out and closing the bathroom door behind her. She held her breath as she leaned against the door, finally exhaling in relief when she heard the soft rustling of fabric and the gentle slosh of water. She set to work immediately.

She beelined straight back to Alya’s room gathering up pieces of crumpled clothing from around the room and piling it together with the musty bedding she had stripped off. She had just made a fresh bed and started the washer when she heard the tub begin to drain and the shower kick on. Good. Ladybug continued to work. She gathered stacks of dirty dishes that were scattered around the bedroom, most were still laden with stale partially eaten food. She set them in the sink to soak while she returned to the room to give it a generous spritz of air freshener. All the while the shower continued to run.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Alya emerged from the bathroom she noticed a nest of fresh blankets had been arranged comfortably on the couch and a bowl of chicken noodle soup sat steaming away on the coffee table. Alya was crying again by the time she snuggled into the warm fabric cocoon. That’s when she noticed a hand scrawled note tucked under the bowl of soup. A tiny ladybug was drawn neatly in one corner. Her hands trembled when she unfolded it. 

‘It’s ok to feel unwell Alya. Call your friend. I bet my spots she misses you too.’

Tears fell from her chin splattering across the familiar handwriting and smearing the ink. She was rereading the short letter for the fifth time when the front door burst open revealing a sweaty Nora breathing heavily as she leaned against the frame. 

“Alya! You’re up, and you took a bath! I’ve been worried brat, and then when Ladybug called me at the gym I didn’t know what to-”

“Nora…” Alya’s voice was hoarse as she interrupted her sister. “I think I need to talk to someone. Will you...talk with me?”

“Nora’s shoulders sagged in relief as she made her way over to her sister sliding beneath the thick duvet and wrapping her in a firm embrace. “I’d love that brat.”

Outside the window Ladybug pressed her hand against the pane and smiled.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day Marinette.exe ceased to function. She had hoped Alya would text her soon, maybe in the next week or so. What she hadn’t expected was for the girl to walk straight through the bakery’s front door the next afternoon just as she was placing a fresh tray of sugar cookies on the cooling rack. 

“Hey girl. I uh… had a feeling you might be home today.” Her complexion was still wan and the circles under her eyes were deep, but she wore a fresh change of clothes and had her clean hair piled atop her head in a big messy bun. She also looked more nervous than Marinette had ever seen the girl. She had the thick strap of her canvas bag gripped with both hands so tightly her knuckles had gone white. She bounced on her toes while she stood in place and her eyes were darting around the many colorful cases around the bakery never looking up to meet Marinette’s wide yes. “I um, bought some hair dye and some face masks. I thought we could hang out today. If you’re not busy! I mean I know you’re always busy now, but-”

Tom Dupain had three decades of bakery experience and two very calloused hands to thank as he caught the falling baking tray mid air with nary a cookie misplaced. Marinette didn’t even consider it as she vaulted over the glass cases and launched herself into her best friends arms. “That sounds great Alya. I've missed you.”

As Marinette pulled away Alya reached up to gently touch her earlobe running one finger across the smooth black stud. Alya made a soft choking sound as she cleared her throat. “I think we have a lot to talk about girl.”

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing I’ve got all night.” Marinette gave a watery chuckle and brought Alya in for another tight embrace completely ignoring the odd looks they were getting from the mid-afternoon regulars. “We’re going to be okay Als.”


End file.
